Toyfare: The Toy Magazine #112

Synopsis

An energy anomaly leads LaForge to beam aboard Kirk, who got lost when Scotty puked on the console. Kirk gives Picard one of his toupees and kills Worf and Alexander for being Klingons. He reprograms Data, fights Riker, and teaches Wesley to be cool. He causes a power drain on the ship when he uses the holodeck. When the Federation is under attack by the Borg, they call in Sisko and Janeway, whom Sisko sexually harasses. Kirk beams over to the Cube. He accidentally stops the ship by pulling the Queen's head off. Then he has sex with her.